Raising a stubborn child can be challenging if you don’t know how to deal with it patiently. The tantrums thrown by a stubborn child are something that most parents experience as a part of their parenting journey, especially with their small kids. Having a stubborn child is not unusual. However, dealing with a stubborn child is crucial for parents to understand. Because the way you deal with your stubborn child today will ensure the kind of personality they turn into as adults.

The behaviour of a stubborn child

Two very prime phases in a child’s life include – toddler and that of a teenager. These two phases are considered crucial as kids are more likely to act unreasonably in these stages. While some children are born stubborn and it is a trait of their character, others act firmly to persuade their will.

When a child is stubborn, he/she doesn’t listen to their parents or elders and doesn’t even follow instructions. Changing the attitude of such children is extremely difficult and no amount of cajoling or pleading can have any effect on them. These kids enjoy defying orders, however, they don’t have any particular reason for the same.

Why does a child act stubborn?

Stubbornness in kids can be due to many reasons. Sometimes, it may be due to jealousy or feeling neglected after the arrival of a sibling. Or it may be due to denying them something they want, such as watching TV, playing video games, and so on. If stubbornness leads to aggression, it becomes extremely difficult to handle. So, it is important to control such behaviour by creating a roadblock before it is too late.  

Tips that might help to deal with a stubborn child 

• Communicate and listen – the foremost thing to do is to communicate with the child and listen to them. Listen carefully and understand their point of view like you want your child to listen and obey your commands. Many stubborn children become rebellious if they are not heard. It is important to have a heart-to-heart conversation with stubborn children, especially if they are throwing tantrums and not listening. Approach them patiently with a cool head and discuss whatever the matter is so that you can sort the thing calmly.

• Connect with them – Instead of forcing a stubborn child to do something you want, you should rather show them that you care and that is why you want them to listen. This way, the child is more likely to understand as compared to when you force them and don’t give them a valid reason for your action. Parents who connect with their children are more likely to have the cooperation of their kids as compared to those who do not connect.

• Show respect to them – This doesn’t mean that you should stand in front of them with folded hands. It is just that you must not force your authority onto your child. For instance, don’t scold the child in front of others nor force them to do a certain thing in public that they don’t want or like. This might develop aggression in them. Try to model respect in your relationship. The kids learn by watching, so just remember that they would act the way you act. Whatever example you will set, they would follow in the footsteps.

• Get help from a child counsellor – A child counsellor is a specialist who can help both the child and the parent in case of a stubborn child. A child counsellor understands child psychology better and thus can help a child in different ways by finding the root problem of the stubbornness of your child. Besides, a child counsellor can also help in strengthening your bond with your child, and with each passing session, you can experience a massive change in the child. 

Controlling inflexibility in children is important before it becomes too late and the most effective way is through love and affection. A child counsellor tenders a child tactfully with care and knows how to deal with child psychology well. Zoylu.com is one such platform, which allows parents to get counselling from renowned and established child counsellors and get help for stubbornness as well as other aspects or challenges of children during their growing years.